This wasn’t intended to be all about one event, but it ended up that way!
So it’s a new year and I’m averaging one post every 18 days! Yeah! Since last post, I went to the greatest redneck event I’ve ever been to: Crash-A-Rama. Yes, I too feel it should be Crash-O-Rama, but oh well, what are ya gonna do? It took place on Black Friday, and was a million times better than shopping.
My local friend Brittany invited me, so I took a Greek friend, Nick, and a French friend, Jerome, to see what real redneck-white-trash looks like and to see the benefits of their genius. The event took place in a town called Bithlo, FL. It was at the speedway, which had a paved track that I figure is a half mile oval, and all dirt in the middle. Maybe there was grass, but it was all dirt by the end. We got the seats where the real fans go and even had to sign a waiver to get into those seats. Here’s what went down:
- Oval race with demolition derby type of cars and much contact.
- Pusher cars – One car isn’t running, its partner car pushes it, and a third car tries to separate the two.
- Skid cars – Front wheel drive and skid plates instead of tires on the back.
- Small demolition derby.
- Boat trailer race – Trucks and cars towing boats and trailers. Last running guy towing something wins.
- Camper trailer race – Same as above, but with camper trailers.
- Figure 8 school bus race.
- The Green Mamba.
I’m sure I missed some, but oh man, it was so awesome. There was a big truck called Fordzilla that was just exploding boats and camper trailers. He was doing it right, going fast and hitting everything he could. The school bus race was incredible. The race started with almost 20 school buses, some were full size with lights flashing, stop signs out, and all the bells & whistles. The first few laps are spent waiting to see the buses get spread out enough to possibly collide in the middle. And on the first chance of a collision came the best one of the night. The 2nd place bus and the last place bus hit and it flipped the 2nd place bus entirely over, landing nice and hard on its wheels!
There was so much awesomeness that I just can’t cover it all in here. Here is a link to a video of the bus race. Hopefully you can see that on Facebook.
The Green Mamba was this jet engine that pretty much had only a seat and four wheels attached to it. They brought it out and lit that exhaust ablaze. Behind the Mamba was one of those airport shuttle buses. The bus wasn’t there very long. It turned into a huge black plume of smoke that may still be floating up somewhere over the Atlantic.
It was an awesome, very cold, night of breathing in smoke, oil fumes, dirt, and all kinds of burnt metal and cheering with Florida’s finest camouflage-clad rednecks. Can’t wait to go back!
