No, I’m not a workaholic, I don’t drink while on the job. What you say? That’s not what a workaholic does? I beg to differ!

Unfortunately, the word workaholic has become commonplace amongst the masses. Let’s take a look at what comprises this horrific monstrosity of a “word” shall we? It is sad, but Webster has this word in the dictionary. From Webster:

Etymology: work + -aholic, alteration of -oholic (as in alcoholic)

Part one: Work. Work is the root of this mutant freak of a word, that is fine. Part two: Alcoholic. For starters, the aholic part for some reason changed the O to an A which makes no sense. Now to dig deeper into the word alcoholic. Let’s see what was changed about the root word to make it addictive in nature. The only change is an added ic. So alcohol becomes alcoholic, simple enough.

Now, someone who works so much that it’s comparable to the drinking habits of an alcoholic. Some genius decided to mesh the two words as workaholic which bothers me to no end. When I hear that word, I think of somebody who just can’t stop drinking while on the job. This is because it’s alcoholic not alcoholaholic.

I submit that if we are going to compare working to drinking (a horrible comparison that is a whole other story), the word ought to be workic. That’s right, simply workic.

He can’t leave the office; he’s a workic.

I’m a bit of a workic.

She was the top salesperson of the quarter. She’s quite the workic.

There, isn’t that nice? No implications that the person has a problem identifiable with that of a compulsive drinker. From now on, I urge you, the reader, to simply add an ic to words to make them addictive. Let’s not make everybody with a passion an alcoholic.

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